4/07/2009 05:59:00 PM
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
the furthest distance in the world is not when you are very far away from the one you love.
but
when you are standing right infront of them and they stare straight through you, not knowing who you are.
just finished essayyy. aw man. my head hurts...
well. isnt this song soothing to the mind? sigh. well, this song pretty much suits the atmosphere right now, hehh.
that anger flowing through my veins.
that pain in my heart.
clutching it tightly and held it back.
at the end is it all worth it?
i ask. is this all worth it?
but theres still one thing that puzzles me.
one thing i have to say.
is it wrong?
if im at the wrong,
i will take the fault and the blame.
but i really dont understand.
please enlighten me.
im sorry
looking into the mirror a few days back.
and thought to myself,
"is this who ive grown up into?"
"is this the person i never wanted to become?"
"why is this person the one achieving all i never wanted?"
"why is this person achieving things i never thought i would have been able to achieve"
"is this the person the one i always wondered whom i will grow into?"
"is this really me?"
questions popping up in my mind.
when you are young, innocent and cheerful,
you live life without knowing whats out there in this open world.
staying in this stress free life with no worries but happiness.
small arguments with friends bout not being each others friends
but turn around minutes later smiling towards one another.
thinking how times lasts forever, how our happy moments will never end.
but as time goes by, we grow up.
we face more challenges in this world.
no longer sheltered with that thought of that imaginary world outside,
thinking it would be the same.
but soon we are proven wrong.
everythings different.
the atmoshphere, enviroment, faces, words, thoughts.
thats when we learn, "time passes fast, too fast."
people say we have to appreciate it,
treasure every moment we've got.
but what if we do? can we still stop time?
no. not even make it slower.
times when we fall and feel the pain.
times when you feel betrayal.
times when you wished for your friends to be there with you.
all passing by quickly but yet somehow remaining in our minds forever.
not forgotten as fast as how time passes by.
what can we do? what can we say? nothing but move on with life.
hurting deep within,
taking actions to forget but yet no avail.
nothing, but that memory flashing past your eyes even more.
having no physical pain matching up to that pain in your heart.
the hurt.
nothing able to reach that same amount of pain.
nothing at all.
fights.
what are these for?
is this a way we humans and living things express our anger?
is this a method we carry out when we are feeling annoyed? disagreements?
must we be programmed to do so?
thinking back on how i never thought i would come by when i was young,
fearing all these cases and things i might get for the outcome.
at the end of the day. i achieve them.
things i hate the most in the eyes of my past self.
but yet. somehow being loved the most by my present self.
lifes a heartless road that we all have to lead.
knocking you down unexpectly and even repeated at the lowest pont of your life.
bringing you up and even more at the happiest point of your life.
expect the unexpected.
unexpect the expected.
peace.
♥
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